I wrote the section below at 2 am one night:
It’s 2 am, I cannot sleep again, unfortunately, this is a typical night for me. After I go to bed I deal with hours of pain, stress, anxiety, itching, spasms and hot and cold flashes. I can’t stop my brain from over thinking and worrying. This disease scares the shit out of me. Let’s be honest, no one understands what CRPS sufferers are going through. The pain, memory loss, spasms, hot/cold, sweating…the list goes on. I feel slightly paranoid. It’s hard to explain: I feel scared, sad, angry, confused and then I can’t remember if I took my pills!
I lie here awake night after night. Dry mouth, leg, and foot freaking out, spasms, thoughts racing through my head and feeling like crying.
Speaking of crying, my emotions are an absolute wreck at times. I sometimes cry at nothing…so annoying.
I am always thirsty, nothing quenches my thirst. So, I drink more water than I usually would. My doctor told to double what I would normally drink and stay hydrated.
I have learned counting and breathing techniques that do help some nights and I get to sleep around midnight or so, but that is infrequent. I keep using the counting and breathing techniques every night, I never know when it’s going to work for me.
All these things make going to bed an awful experience. I will admit this, before the CRPS, I LOVED MY SLEEP! I dread going to bed some nights. It is important to tackle these issues head on and get them fixed as soon as possible. Sleep is a major key to getting healthy. This is a continuing issue for me, but I work on it night after night, hoping one day I will resume some sort of sleep normality.
I have to try again to get to sleep. Good night.
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